Lelouch's Merchandise
by Windrises
Summary: Lelouch tries to make himself and his team more popular by selling merchandise of the team.


Note: Code Geass' studio is Sunrise.

Lelouch Lamperouge pranced to the living room and said, "I've got something important to tell you."

C. C. asked, "What's going on?"

Lelouch said, "Our lives have gotten a lot better since we met each other. However we've been missing one important thing that would give us a lifetime of happiness." Lelouch got on one knee and held C. C.'s hand.

C. C. was hoping that Lelouch was proposing to hear. However she tried to not bring her hopes up too high, because she had been fooled by Lelouch before. She asked, "What important thing are you talking about my love?"

Lelouch said, "Merchandise." C. C. frowned at Lelouch. Lelouch said, "I hope you're not one of those people that hates product placement as much as film critics do."

C. C. asked, "Why would we need merchandise?"

Lelouch said, "People have had mixed feelings about us and our team. People often get more respect for things when merchandise comes out. If we have a team of designers make stuffed animals, action figures, dolls, pictures, and soda cans of us we could become more popular than we've ever been. Of course all the merchandise will have to be of me as Zero, because they can't know my real name."

C. C. replied, "This sounds like a really silly idea."

Lelouch pretended to feel offended by C. C.'s comment. He asked, "Have I ever come up with silly ideas?"

C. C. said, "You come up with several silly plans a week."

Lelouch replied, "I only come up with like seven silly plans a week."

C. C. said, "That means you come up with a silly plan everyday."

Lelouch replied, "I like to make sure that everyday is special. That's why I spend everyday with you."

C. C. said, "I'm flattered, but I'm concerned that you'll waste money on this plan."

Lelouch replied, "Don't worry. I'll make millions of dollars from the merchandise." Lelouch hired a bunch of different teams of designers to make merchandise of him and his team.

Two months the first batch of merchandise was ready. Lelouch had a meeting with the Black Knights as Zero. Zero said, "I had tons of really good merchandise made."

Kaname Ohgi asked, "What's the point of having merchandise made of us?"

Zero imitated Tony Jay while saying, "We've got to have money."

Ohgi asked, "Is getting money that important?"

Zero said, "There's no person or material item that's more important to me."

C. C. said, "Ahem."

Zero replied, "Of course you're my favorite thing in the world. I was just exaggerating the importance of money to make sure that my team respects this mission."

General Tohdoh said, "As long as it helps us in our mission of saving Japan we'll support whatever you do Zero."

Zero responded, "This mission will benefit our plan."

Ohgi asked, "How?"

Zero said, "By getting tons of customers to buy merchandise of us will make us more popular with mainstream audiences. Despite how big we are there are people that don't know that much about us."

Tamaki said, "If Diethard did his job right we would always have the press that we need."

Diethard replied, "I've been working very hard to broadcast Zero's adventures. However it's difficult to get the right amount of people to watch it, because there's so many good shows on TV and the internet."

Zero said, "I think that you guys will be blown away by the awesome products that are going to be sold at thousands of stores." Zero grabbed some action figures out of his merchandise bag and said, "The action figure team made five different action figures: two of me as well as one of C. C., Kallen, Ohgi, and Tohdoh."

Tamaki angrily asked, "How come they didn't make a toy of me?"

Zero said, "They only made action figures of the team members that are essential to the team."

Tamaki replied, "Fair enough."

Diethard asked, "Why did they make two of you Zero? It would make sense if they made none, because of your name."

Zero said, "Stop making jokes newsboy."

The Black Knights started looking at the action figures. Ohgi said, "They're really well made."

Kallen said, "The toy of me is pretty."

Diethard replied, "It's nothing special." Kallen stuck her tongue out at Diethard.

Ohgi asked, "Did they make anything else?"

Zero said, "They also made stuffed animals of me and C. C." Zero showed the others a bunch of adorable looking Zero and C. C. stuffed animals.

C. C. said, "They're really cute."

Diethard whined, "I wish they made stuff of me."

Zero said, "They even made dolls of me and C. C." Zero presented the dolls to the others.

C. C. asked, "Are these like Barbie dolls?"

Zero said, "Close enough."

C. C. said, "I must admit the dolls they made of me are really well made."

Diethard replied, "You didn't have to admit that. That was a cheap way to compliment yourself."

Kallen said, "Ignore newsboy. The dolls of you and Zero are really nice."

Zero said, "Those are the only items of us that exist so far. However I plan on having t-shirts, soda cans, magazine covers, and various other types of merchandise made."

C. C. said, "I notice that the designers made nothing of Rakshata."

Rakshata Chawla said, "I could care less about merchandise being made of me. What would intrigue me is merchandise of the mechs that I make."

Zero replied, "That's a splendid idea Rakshata. We could have the toy designers make mechs. They could become the next Transformers."

Rakshata said, "I'm okay with that as long as they don't make another film series about robots beating each other up."

Ohgi replied, "I want to give these ideas my full support, but I don't know if they'll sell that well."

Zero responded, "I believe in this idea with most of my heart so you don't need to worry that much about how successful it'll be. If you want to donate to the cause go to your local stores and buy some stuff of us."

A week later Zero had another meeting with the Black Knights. Zero said, "I've had us come here to discuss how the first week of business went."

C. C. asked, "How have things been going so far?"

Zero said, "Not that great. We've only sold a few hundred toys and dolls. Have you guys been supporting the cause at all?"

Diethard said, "Don't worry Zero. I bought enough merchandise of you to make a shrine to you."

Zero responded, "Um, okay."

Kallen asked, "Are we going to lose money from all the money that you spent having merchandise made of us?"

Zero said, "I don't think so. We need to wait a month for things to get a lot better."

A month later Zero had another meeting with the Black Knights. Zero said, "Things went much worse than I thought they would."

Kallen whispered, "I predicated that."

C. C. asked, "Why did profits turn out so badly?"

Zero said, "Making merchandise based on heroes who have questionable moral values turned out to be a bad idea. Lots of parents banned their kids from getting stuff of us and adults didn't get that much stuff either."

Tohdoh asked, "How much money did we lose?"

Zero said, "About half of the money we had is gone."

Ohgi asked, "How will we afford the equipment we use to fight crime?"

Zero said, "We'll have to keep using the same technology we have enough. Try not to get anything broken."

Diethard replied, "But I accidentally broke most of my news cameras."

Kallen said, "I'm ashamed of you Zero for wasting so much of our money on a foolish scheme."

Zero imitated a Batman villain called Baby Doll while saying, "I didn't mean to."

Lelouch and C. C. went home. Lelouch said, "My money making scheme didn't work out at all. I gained nothing from it."

C. C. replied, "Well, I gained a lot of merchandise of you." C. C. showed Lelouch all of the merchandise of Zero that you bought.

Lelouch replied, "You truly were loyal to the cause. You and Diethard bought more stuff of me than anybody else. Your stuffed animal collection is crazy big. How many stuffed animals of me did you buy?"

C. C. blushed and said, "One hundred."

Lelouch said, "You make me feel guilty, because I only bought eighty stuffed animals of you."

C. C. giggled and said, "That's way more than enough."

Lelouch asked, "What are you going to do with all those stuffed animals?"

C. C. said, "If I ever go anywhere without you I'll bring one of the stuffed animals with me. That way I'll always have something to hug."

Lelouch replied, "That's too sentimental. I'm going to go the gym. I'll be back in a hour."

C. C. asked, "Do you wanna bring a stuffed animal with you?"

Lelouch said, "Come on. I'm too cool for something that cute. Besides you're cuter than all the stuffed animals in the world combined." Lelouch hugged C. C.

After hugging for ninety seconds C. C. said, "That's enough cuteness for now. You can go to the gym now."

Lelouch replied, "I was just pretending to be heading to the gym so I wouldn't seem too sentimental and cute."

C. C. smiled and said, "I'm sorry darling, but there's no guy more sentimental and cute than you. You're not good when it comes to marketing, but you're the best at making me happy."

Lelouch said, "Back to the drawing board." Lelouch started working on his next attempt to make more money.


End file.
